Oh my word its wonderful to be here! I'm not sure what the Stranglers meant when they said it was the only place were the clouds were interesting. The plane trip was a long one. Lots of time to think. It was a clear night and you could see for miles. You could see for years. I found myself thinking about all the steps that had led me to that very point. For no intelligent reason at all, I was travelling 30,000 feet up in a relatively comfortable chair encased in a large aluminum thermos with wings.
Most of the passengers were dressed in your typical Euro airport travel garb. Urban hiking gear and obscure running shoes, upper middle class dress code. Everyone seemed to be enjoying their communal commuter coma. Rubbing my hands over my embarrassing worn out pants, i see the dirt in the cracks of my skin and the grease lodged under the my crusted fingers. It seems like Ive been kicking my own ass for the past 20 years in one odd way or another. There's a pretty obvious visual distinction between me and the entire rest of the air bus. Certainly there's got to be at least one other career scumbag on this flight.
It was then that a bright idea oozed through my filthy mesh hat. Our generation needs a proper calling card! A way to cut through the dramatic BS and all the artsy fartisms. Psychological dog tags for our fellow clansmen. A visual K-9 butt sniff amongst tribal mongrels!
In the time it took to fly from The United States of America to Sweden, I was able to break down the core motivating forces in myself and I suspect all the rest of my friends. Now If you are reading this and I know you are, you might be interested in motorcycles, riding them or making them or owning more than one building full of them. Lucky for you, this amazing break through I broke through on the jumbo liner may apply to someone you know too!
Theres 3 choices. 3 fundamental reasons why I still file, grind, weld, make way too much god damned noise all day, haggle with old men about shit that some kid will haggle with me about someday, collect garbage, stay up too late on craigslist, worry about obscure tires from 40 years ago, wonder what steel shot leaves the best finish on aluminum from before the Korean War....its best to break them down one at a time, but you knew that was coming right?
Denominator #1: Size Compensation
Now relax this doesn't always mean what you think it means. Size could be a height requirement that never got met, it could mean you never had anything as a child, little arms, balding in your late teens, or yea, I guess it can mean you have a meek shriveler, or a withered wiggler.
Denominator #2: Father Issues
Pretty self explanatory. The old man was gone a lot, thought you were a pussy, or some other weird psychological mind warper. Somehow you gotta prove to your subconscious inner father that you are shaping up to be a fine young man.
Denominator #3: Male infatuation
You have an unquenchable desire to be in the company of other men. While it may never escalate to intense passion, ultimately I think that's what lies at the top floor of this particular motivator.
Now don't go mother f'ing me all at once! I know when you break this down cold it sounds like a nagging ex girlfriend talking about why she thought the relationship between the two of you was a disaster or a bunch of metro intellectuals quietly critiquing a wily pack of 2 wheeled pack hunters from the safety of their booth at the Internet cafe. I hate it as much as you do. It was a long flight. The better half of the time over the Atlantic was spent trying to convince myself I had just eaten that in flight meal too fast or maybe the cabin pressure was dangerously low. You're probably thinking hell this is ridiculous. I just like moto bikes. I like the way they look, I like riding, or I like working on them. That's fine, that's normal. This regulatory system is designed for people with motorcycle helmet tattoos on their chest. Or carburetors on their beds. People that own a 15,000.00 Panhead but they haven't been able to pay off that 3500.00 credit card debt in ten years. This is for people with 2 tool boxes just full of body hammers. Sick people.
Look I don't like this any more than you do. I think the sooner we all come to grips the sooner we can move past it. We've all joked about each possibility amongst our friends. In fact you can be guilty of not 1/3 but 2/3 or even all 3/3!
Which leads me to my brilliant idea! I think its hi time our generation puts their mark on the quintessential biker jacket of the ages. Our forefathers gave us the 69, the 13, AMA were the 99% and outlaws were the other number. I think our generation has spent enough time on long flights to know the root of it all. Its time we celebrated the age of enlightenment. I invite you all to proclaim your fraction. The best/most important part is you must never divulge what the fraction signifies. Its important because it signifies you have come to terms with your motivating force, you are one with the maker. Now you are flying the plane!
- Brandon Casquilho / Stockholm / 04-04-2012